Hi Everyone! Happy Monday! Hope you had a good weekend! Since I have had a reprieve from the weather I have spent the last few days playing catch up. While running around doing errands and waiting for various appointments I was doing some reading on my phone. It started with one article and soon I found links to related ones. It was the topic that I wanted to share with you. Seems in the light of the new box-office release everyone is talking about kink and BDSM. So of course, I wanted to join in! This is just an introduction into a topic I plan to explore in more detail but wanted to start the conversation with a few points.
What is it?
Let’s start with the most obvious of questions. Is the dominance and submission or even the kink portrayed on screen or in books realistic? My personal opinion is yes – but it relative to each of us. What is kinky to one might not be to another. That being said – I will concede to the fact that very few have the resources to afford such an extensive playroom and extravagant lifestyle of your submissive. However, there are some very good points to focus on.
Communication is Key
In any relationship, I can not stress enough the importance of communication. Communicating is vital, as is setting boundaries. I think it is very important to have a clear understanding of what is and isn’t expected of the other (or others – lol) Not everyone will go to the extent of having a fancy legal document. But you need to have a least a conversation or two. Now, I am open for a lot but even I have had these talks with my partner. My last one knew if I was in a submissive role ~ no gag ball.
Taking That First Leap (or spank – lol)
Now that you have had at least the chance to lay the groundwork ~ let the fun begin. Even if you have never touched a sex toy or you are unsure how to use bondage tape ~ you can do this. And more importantly ~ you WANT TO!! Know your limits, push them, but not to the point you are no longer enjoying it. Speaking of enjoyment ~ don’t be surprised just how much you do enjoy it!
This is a topic I would like to continue chatting about with you. Please share your thoughts or even your adventures and check back real soon for a follow up.
Hugs,
Ms Kay Marie
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what a great post! I would agree with you that what we read and watch is like the real thing but like you said it is all in the eye of the beholder as to what is realistic and what is not. There are many people who think kinky is doing it on all fours or having the woman on top and then for some of us kinky is shoving a cock down a mans throat hehehehe know your limits is great advice!
Communication is definitely key, and so is knowing your interests, limits, and those of others involved.
One way or another, I’m going to have fun with my subs—whether that’s through Dominance, sadism, humiliation, feminization, coerced bi, or something else—but I prefer that they enjoy the experience as well. I like to play rough with my toys, but I don’t break them. That requires that all participants involved actually talk about what they like, and what they don’t—it helps clear up any misunderstandings and leads to a much better experience for everyone 🙂
Ms Constance ~ LOL – yep we all have our kinks.And I love it!
Ms Lilly ~ You are so right. Setting the ground rules, knowing what each other wants and expects is the first step, It also opens everyone up to enjoy what the are experiencing without wondering if the other person is enjoying it too. I love how you put it “like to play rough with your toys but that you son’t like to break them’ – that is perfect!