Hi Everyone! Hope you all had a great weekend! I wanted to pick up where I left off last time and start discussing that big pink elephant in the room ~ cost! It’s expensive being all girlie ~ even more so if you are transitioning as well. However, it’s not just the cost that can be a challenge. For many, the reality is, basic resources are out of their reach. Even their opportunities to get a little girlie are limited. Here are some of my thoughts on these things. I will follow it up later this week with few suggestions on how to face those realities and some tips on how anyone can get their girl on…. regardless.
A Reality Check ~ What you see is not a realistic example of being feminine
By any standards, Caitlyn Jenner looked gorgeous on the cover of Vanity Fair. Ok, first, she was on the cover of Vanity Fair ~ need I really say more. I want to stress this to anyone out there that is thinking, “Oh my, I can never look like that,” ~ no one can in daily life. The simple fact is, no one on or in a magazine or movie can ever be used as an example of what is reality. Do not let yourself feel like you are less because you don’t look like that. She is beautiful there is no disputing that. But the truth is, she had a professional make up artist and hair stylist (at least one of each), a stylist, flattering lighting and an amazing photographer. The cost of the wardrobe alone was probably the same as many people’s annual income. Also, I would venture to guess, that wasn’t the only picture taken.
Most trans do not have access to the resources that Caitlyn Jenner has access to. And for most, if they have access to resources, the do not have the financial resources to utilize them. I will never dismiss the struggle she must have had within herself for years. However, much of her transition has been easier than most. (I will also admit, much has been a lot harder as well. Could you imagine walking in for a procedure only to have a photographer there waiting and taunting you?) Regardless of how far one wishes to take their transition and femininity, cost and access to services are a factor. It is the same for any other woman ~ old or young ~ who has looked at a celebrity and felt as though they don’t measure up. Please don’t use that as a standard. It’s just not realistic.
Can you look and feel feminine and be “passable” without surgical and stylist dream teams?
Yes you can!!! First, if a physical transformation is what you truly desire, speak with your doctor. Please do not try to self medicate because you are afraid to talk with your physician. If your doctor is close-minded ~ get another doctor!! I am reading about positive steps forward with insurance covering transitional procedures. Have the conversations.
Regardless of your physical transformation, you are going to need to get into all that girlie stuff. Let’s face it, being feminine and/or transitioning comes with a maintenance bill. But it’s not about looking like what is on a cover. Your style should flatter you ~ not mimic someone else! If you don’t have access to or your daily life limits your access to a professional make up artist, a good stylist or a makeover, there are plenty things you can do at home. The internet is a cornucopia of ideas for any budget or comfort level. I have some of my own to share as well. These skills will take time to learn. I assure you, there will be trial and error. (we have all had makeup fails and what not to wear days/years)
Check back in a couple days. I am going to conclude this series with some of my tips for embracing your femininity regardless of your budget or how open you are.
Until next time!
Hugs,
Ms Kay Marie
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Mistress Kay Marie,
Such an awesome blog post. Seriously, this is a very straight forward and well written post about transitions. I really love seeing you lend true advice, and what to expect from “the pink elephant” hehe. You are so right on, even just getting girly in general can be so expensive. As much as fantasy is fun, it’s not always realistic with some of the costs. That’s why I always say…
“rule #1 in girly life lesson”- Find a bargain.
Ms Tabetha ~ OMG YES!! I am a total bargain hunter!! I am going to share some of my budget tips in the final post of the series and please share any you have! I for one, shop the sales!!!
Ms. Kay this is a great third installment of this series.
While it is true that most do not have the financial resources of Ms. Jenner, when someone had a great support network, and a guide who loves feminization (like the Mistresses here) we can give amazing tips and tricks that save money.
As an example, a sugar scrub that costs honestly $58 in a department store can be MADE, double the amount for a couple of dollars with things most have i their homes!
I will be looking forward to your tips next week 🙂
Ms. Delia
I’d never go through surgery,that’s to much. I do love to go shopping for women’s clothes. Just being in in lingerie section is a thrill along with being where makeup/lipstick/perfume samples are also. I so would love to go with women shopping but am afraid what they will think:( women’s clothes are sexier and better then guy clothes by far. Honestly I look better wearing them instead of guy clothes. With bra/panty set on along with slip and pumps my body looks so much better. I admit it’s only way I can get hard and off. I’ve sat in makeup chair and had makeup put on me and it was exciting & thrilling to have women in control of me like that. I’d love to find & meet women to do that to me. But I’ve had no luck and I’m afraid I’d cum in my panties:(
I’m loving what I’ve seen of this blog series so far 🙂 Another excellent post Ms. KayMarie–straight forward, to the point, and accurate. Not everyone has access to the resources and finances to pull off a transition on the scale of Caitlyn’s, but you don’t NEED to in order to look and feel your fabulous, feminine best. Also–excellent photographers, stylists, makeup artists, lighting technicians, and a photoshop savant can make ANYONE look sensational (while the same person in the same outfit on the street would look rather….different).
Skilled application of cosmetics (even bargain brands), flattering cuts for clothes, the right shapewear, wigs, and heels, can help any trans woman get closer to her dreams of having her outward appearance at long last match how she sees herself on the inside. I’m thrilled that as Mistresses, we can help show them how 🙂
Ms Delia ~ I am having so fun putting together these tips. Unfortunately, my plumbing snafu has put a little delay on getting them all together and posted! I love “at home” scrubs and soaks. They are usually better and oh so much cheaper!
Peter ~ Do not be afraid of what anyone think of you. If you are happy, then the people around you that care for you, will be happy too. You just need to be shopping with the right woman or women. You can even take your Mistress with you on the phone! Do not let anyone hold you back.
Ms Lilly ~ Thank you!!! I love how Caitlyn’s transition has us all talking but it can be intimidating thinking that is the standard. Caitlyn is no different than any other cover girl in that regard! You are so right ~ make up skills, correct clothing & accessories and a girl is at HER best!